.... sittin here, trying to create something to look at .... made a lil avatar... quite proud of it... if u didnt guess then my last name begins with an F...


should really b looking over my incredibly important exams, but just not... prob will look back tomorrow in 12 hours (half way though the maths exam) and wish I had at least written the answers on the inside of my arm... but ohh well

I heard peoples stories, sayin how they wish they did more things, tried to get away with more, been a bit more adventurous not just with activities, but with life, u know what I mean? I would just hate to b one of those people, no doubt I will look back n prob see it at one point... but i'll try not to.

i dont wanna b a "would have, could have..... but didnt" just scares me, guess i dont know what i'm missing, good or bad, I wanna know, and i cant b told by elders because its what they felt, not what i would feel, u know what I mean?

I feel like Alfie (old school version rather then a P.C. Jude law) just from the 'u know what i mean' not from the womanising or the accent. just really humanises him (film studies lessons did pay off) and i'm writing on a page to u, u know what i mean?

Right... this is actually more like an online diary then ne thing else, i haven’t submitted more then 2 pieces (embarrassingly) and its not like i'v even been busy... i wanna, just dont... got lots of ideas, just cant draw, lots of stories, just not relevant... so its just a rant... but it makes me laugh

sittin here listening to Grandaddy - A.M. (from 28 days later...) and i have this enormous sense of well being and i cant think y. i actually cant stop smiling. i have a maths exam 2 morrow, i'm pretty much broke and in debt to my parents, having relationship issues... but i dont mind... this songs on repeat, if i go to sleep now i get at least 9 hours... and i'm just happy... just happy.... being

yeah but tomorrow will come and this will come down on me like a tonne of bricks, but thats just it... bothered? i'm here, feelin pretty damn good about nothing at all (as in nothing specific)

Oh ok one thing thats making me absolutely raving mad is this stupid fucking pop up from Microsoft (TM) say "u'v installed new stuff on ur computer... for them to work u must restart ur computer" <restart Now> or < restart Later> ...... every 5 minutes this bastard
pops up and it dosnt get that I DONT WANT TO RESTART THE MOTHER FUCKER NOW! I'LL DO IT WHEN EVER THE FUCK I FUCKING LIKE!!!... lol

Scary thing happened to me the other day, the neighbour across my road caught me on the way to college, i pulled my lil push bike up and she's one of these sweet little old ladies (one of the ones that would prob say she wanted to take more risks in her life, but i dunno) and she asked how my family and i was and i said we were fine and asked after her etc etc. then she asked about these exams i told her when my first ones were (this wed gone, thanks for askin) and she said not to worry about them, it would be alright, and all i;v got to get through is this little bit and u could be set for life... the scary thing was that untill that point, it never really dawned on me. I guess the thing i'm gettin at is what scares me at the minute is the realisation of whats actually goin on in my life and how long it goes on before i realise its happening. and is there something still going on now...

*DUM DUM DUM!* (deagetic <[that not how u spell it] music to break up the tension and create a comical feel to the writing)

^more film stuff there^

RIGHT! thats it, I'm off to bed, just run this through a spell checker to iron out all unreadable english, then i'll listen to the end of Grandaddy - A.M. (17,000 play through atm, give or take) and then i'll get some extra sleep. maybe do some art work.... in my dreams

btw if this isnt taken in the way its intended then u need to smile more... get less wrinkles